How Random Babbling Becomes Corporate Policy (t3knomanser) wrote,
How Random Babbling Becomes Corporate Policy

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A rebuttal to my esteemed Colleauge

In the last edition of Mad Scientists Quarterly, my esteemed colleague, Ignar Vikinsen made the proposal that child abuse could be resolved through a society of nurtured caring and mutual love.

The problem he is attempting to solve is an important one indeed. Many studies have shown that abused children will continue that cycle, and further, by applying the tenets of Lamarkian Evolution, we can also conclude that the contusions and breaks that weaken that child will be transmitted to their children- and since the abused child will become the abuser, their already weakened children will be made weaker, and the process will be repeated in the offspring until humanity is rendered extinct.

However, I must contest Mr. Vikinsen's proposal- love and nurturing are unquantifiable, and the application of them takes a large amount of work- the first making it unnaceptable to a scientist, and the second rendering it innappropriate to a technological society.

Instead, I must offer a simple method of adjusting the behavior of a child, which is the root of the problem. Abusers often do so to correct real or percieved failings of the child, but it is quite obvious that no amount of abuse or neglect will actually change a child's behavior, as is evinced by my own childhood. Further, abuse weakens the human race, as stated above. A simple expedient is to simply kill the child outright. All behavior problems are resolved, and any risk of polluting the human stock is rendered absent.

Dr. Azbek Halfgood, MD, PhD, DDS, Esq.

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