How Random Babbling Becomes Corporate Policy (t3knomanser) wrote,
How Random Babbling Becomes Corporate Policy
t3knomanser

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Historically, the United States has run on a series of "War's". Most recently, we had the "War on Poverty" (total and utter failure), the "War on Drugs" (failure) and now the "War on Terrorism" (hrmmm.... lets think).

Now the purpose of this is obvious, after all, if you give citizens something to hate, you can direct them in a single direction far more easily. Now, when the "War on Terrorism" exhausts itself, which it inevitably will, I can see the next war.

The War on Condoms.

This latex menace is poised, and ready to strike whenever you are least expecting it. That's right, with condoms out, and available, people are going to be having sex- and not having children, or contracting diseases. How can your fragile community survive sexually satisified people? Do you really want these condom fiends sitting down the street from you, unwrapping the foil, and putting latex on their genitals? That's what they do! And you thought needles and heroin were unsafe, latex and genitals are a combination that spells out: "ANARCHY".

Please, turn to Big Bush to protect you from this peril! If someone offers you a condom, "Just Say No!". In schools, we'll be instituting a program, C.U.R.E., Condom Use Resistance Education, and teach children such crucial catch phrases as: "No thank you," and "Condoms are for loosers," and how to avoid the Muslim Condom Pushers (after all, where do you go to buy condoms other than some arab owned quickie mart? HUH?).
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